Enkais- The ins and outs of Japanese work parties

I’ve been to two enkais now, one for my junior high where I spend most of my days, and one for an elementary where I’d spent only one day prior to the enkai. This should have been a precursor to what I was getting myself into in terms of their desire to use me as an excuse for a party, but they were both very different experiences.

There’s some enkai etiquette that first needs to be mastered:

• NEVER let anyone pour their own drinks, and never pour your own.

• When clinking glasses, always clink lower than your superiors

• Never take a sip before the “kanpai” (cheers)

• If you’re a girl, don’t sit cross-legged

With all these in mind, I headed to my first enkai with my junior high school. It was at an Italian restaurant, and I spent the evening with my five fellow JTE’s (Japanese Teachers of English), with a very informal conversation and environment. I could tell that it was really helping them get to know me better, we shared a lot of laughs, and now in school I have much more banter in the staff room. Just this morning, I got a playful slap from a teacher for taking the piss out of the shrine on her desk of a Japanese actor 20 years her junior.

One of the JTE’s is newly qualified and is the closest teacher I have to my age at any of my schools. We’re bonding too, with her sending me cute LINE stickers asking about my weekend, bitching about her boyfriend and only afterwards discussing lessons plans with me for the following week. I guess you could call her my first friend in the workplace.

My second enkai couldn’t have been more different. At this elementary school, barely any of the teachers speak English. It was held at a super fancy Chinese restaurant, providing free-flowing beer pitchers and lots of tapas like dishes. This was much more formal, as I was told to sit next to the vice-principal and await the principal’s arrival. Many speeches given at various interludes and I also had to give a little speech myself.

My night was spent trying to decipher slurred Japanese, mainly from my tantosha (supervisor), who told me in small terms he loved me, couldn’t wait to work with me, and proceeded to try to set me up on a date with one of the other young teachers. My principal is also super enthusiastic for me to practice calligraphy with her during my free periods as we did it last time I was there.

All in all, while enkai’s can get pretty expensive, and I barely had time to eat my food since so many people wanted a conversation with me, I got to experience two very different ones. Hopefully the enkais in the future, will be just as, if not more, entertaining.